The truth about plans – pregnancy: why they usually only cause trouble

Life is full of plans. Some are small and insignificant, others big and ambitious. But hardly anything is as certain as the realization that most of the plans you make will fail at some point or turn out to be completely unrealistic. Especially in special phases of life, when you are preparing for changes or have certain ideas, it is shown again and again that theLife has its own rules and the best plans often only increase the anger if they fail. This article reflects personal experiences and insights into why it is usually better to let go of the plans and just let life come to you. It’s about giving up the illusion of control and instead enjoying the moment, even if everything goes differently thanprovided.

The greatest insight: Many plans are just a waste of time

You really should only make the plans that are really close to your heart, because anything that goes beyond that is usually just a source of frustration and unnecessary stress. Especially the plans that are settled in the first and second category are usually just illusions that only cause trouble in retrospect. Basically, there’s no point in worrying about thingsbreak that you can’t control anyway. Over time, you learn that it’s much healthier to just forget such unnecessary plans and instead accept reality as it comes. It is a painful but important lesson that life does not go to our expectations, but often completely different.

The illusion of control and the truth of life

Especially in special moments when you have great expectations, you are always taught otherwise. It’s an experience that you’re only slowly making and that you’ll only realize later: The more you plan, the less control you actually have. Life shows you through small and large setbacks that the best intentions sometimes only increase stress. It’s a lotMore relaxed to focus on the essentials and enjoy the moment instead of constantly thinking about the future. This realization usually only comes after many disappointments, but then it is all the more valuable.

Personal experiences with your own planning addiction

Personally, I’ve always liked making plans, which gave my life a structure and security. Especially during my pregnancy I have developed countless ideas about how everything should go. I imagined lying on a deck chair on the balcony, my stomach in the sunshine, drinking smoothies. I planned to work until shortly before birth, thatSet up a children’s room in delicate mint yellow and plan the birth process in detail. My great wish was a water birth without painkillers, with music and calm. But even during the pregnancy I realized that reality would look completely different. Life had different plans, and my ideas broke down on the small, unpredictable things.

Reality keeps catching up with you

As my stomach kept getting bigger, I had to realize that the idea of lying comfortably on a deck chair was hardly possible. Even the smallest movement became a challenge, and leaning back triggered a kind of movement spectacle in my unborn child. The first smoothie I wanted to drink landed on the balcony before he reached my mouth. meCould hardly drink without swallowing me, let alone sitting relaxed on a deck chair. Before the birth I could hardly work because my head had turned into a kind of mashed potato tin. Concentration was hardly possible, and I moved things that would never have occurred to me before, to the freezer or the basement. My mind just wasn’tmore up to the point. Life showed me that plans, as beautiful as they are, are usually just wishful thinking.

The birth plan – a big joke

Probably the biggest nonsense was my birth plan, which sounded perfect in theory, but was hardly feasible in reality. I often wondered why hospitals even offer such plans, probably to make a good impression. But at the real moment, when the pain starts and everything goes differently than expected, such plans are just a ridiculous memory. during theLanes in which you moan and scream, you can hardly think about the plan. I didn’t want painkillers, but when the pain became unbearable, I called them. A young midwife tried to explain the plan to me, but at that moment I was only focused on the end of the pain. the idea of listening to background music or checking the process closely,Was completely absurd at that moment. It is amazing how little such plans are in reality.

What the plans ignored

However, the plans I had made forgot something very important: the baby. The baby I had imagined so beautifully didn’t want to shop at all or sit in cafés. It was much preferred to be close to his mother, rested and didn’t enjoy walking or great activities. My idealized Sunday plans, walks, coffee and shopping together,were completely smashed by reality. Instead, I spent most of the time with the baby in the living room while trying to get enough sleep. The house became a place I barely recognized, full of chaos, dirty laundry and scattered furniture. All other mothers who constantly boiled, knitted, sewed and perfectly decorated the house seemed toto live in another world. For me, the following was: Every day I was showered and dressed was a success. The sport I had planned always fell right in the time when the baby was asleep. All these experiences taught me that plans are usually just wishful thinking that hardly exist in reality. All the stress you put on to keep it up isMostly free. Today I know: It is much better to live the moment, to take life as it comes, and not to think about the future all the time.